The perfect child bubble: ker... SPLAT.... POP

Ok, so maybe I already knew he wasn't the perfect child. But I have to admit, Larry and I, aware of our biases, have believed Kaleb to be the most adorable, cute, precious little thing on earth. Sure, we know he has a temper, sure, we went 8 months of zombie land with no sleep and lots of screaming. Yes, we are afraid for the future temper tantrums and who's will is going to win out in the end, having small tastes of what is in store for us. But that is not of what I am referring to at this time.

I have not yet had many opportunities to see Kaleb around other children. When I would pick him up at daycare, he was strapped into a high chair screaming for freedom, or previous to his mobility, he would be in a bouncy or something of the like, animatedly watching other children. We knew from the start he enjoyed watching other kids. He would have kids around, and instantly have a happy look on his face, and be fascinated. But, as I worked, the only chance I really have had to see him around other children, is when we go visit family, and Kaleb has acted shy, or just been fascinated watching the chaos. We have had a few parties where Kaleb was up and other kids around, and generally, he was just fascinated by other kids.

Recently we went to a friend's house where Kaleb instantly felt comfortable (Yes, that's you guys, kartchners) and he enjoyed watching Bentley and playing around him. So far, so good, right? And now that he has switched daycare's, I go to pick him up, and he has been playing nicely and excitedly with the other children. Thus far, my experience of my darling, has been that he enjoys other children, and that I need to get him around more kids for fun times.

As my son is so perfect (sarcastic tone of course), a natural thing to do is observe how imperfect others are. :) So, in watching other children around Kaleb, I have been angered when other kids shoved him down in spite to hurt him. I've had those horrible thoughts that certain kids are brats, and must be hard to parent, as they rip everything out of kaleb's hands because it is what THEY want, thinking that I don't want to do a lot of play dates with certain kids because of their "bully" nature. So far, my son has been the recipient of "bad" behavior, not the instigator. Well, today, I finally saw that HE can be the bully. What a hard fall that was...

Alanna has this amazing toy that kids (or adults) of all ages like. But, imagine her own kids wanting it, another child, Lizzy, wanting it, and kaleb wanting it. Alanna had her son Bentley in her lap trying to distract him and teach him to share his toys. Kaleb was the youngest, and Lizzy deferred to him, pouting quietly, but letting kaleb hog it. When I noticed, and tried to get him to share with Lizzy, he was very vocal about not wanting to give it up, held on to it with all his might. At that moment, my own perfect child had become the brat! It was the first time I had ever seen it, his short life of 13.5 months... But HE was being the one ripping it out of someone else's hands, and screaming when I tried to get him to share.

Previous behaviors had always been explained by how others were treating him, or lack of nap or food (which were also in play here) but NEVER have I seen Kaleb be the OTHER kid... the one I looked at, grateful that MY son was not like that. HA HA HA. So, as a novice parent, I've had my knees knocked out from under me. I'm sure with the months to come, I'll be knocked flat on my face more than once. I know it comes with the territory. But there is something about knowing something will happen in theory, and actually LIVING out that theory.

Obvious sign you have a good or bad daycare provider

While Kaleb attended our previous Daycare for the last year or so, we knew he loved Miss Nora, and she him. It seemed to be a very special relationship, and Miss Nora admitted that he was like her son or grandson, and when she found out he was leaving, she vowed never to love another child in daycare, as it was too hard to see them leave her. She didn't want to become attached to another child like Kaleb, and have to miss them. Obviously, it was a loving relationship, and we are very grateful Kaleb had her there. She is the main reason we stayed there for so long, even though I was VERY unhappy with the overall daycare.

But, the typical experience of picking him up from daycare was very gratifying for me... I would come into the room, and his upset, screaming, or crying face would immediately light up in the hugest smile, he would excitedly babble and find a way (crawling or walking) to get to me as fast as possible! One of those things that warms a parent's heart, feeling like your child actually is excited to see you! Nearer to the end, Kaleb would see me, and instantly grab my hand and try to get OUT of there. He didn't want to spend the time putting on a coat, or saying goodbye. he just wanted OUT. But, I still got that beautiful, excited smile at my arrival... which was something I looked forward to!

Kaleb was supposed to start with our new daycare provider that week the snow hit and cancelled everything (except MY work of course). So, he didn't start with her until this past Friday. So, he's only been there a couple of days, but my favorite moment of the day has now disappeared! I go in to pick him up, and last night especially (now that he is obviously more comfortable there) and he DID NOT want to go home. he was NOT excited to see me, and wanted to stay and play with his new friends.

It's one of those things, where I am THRILLED that we are more comfortable with his daycare, we feel that he is getting the love and attention and guidance that we want him to get, and are actually pleased that he gets more than we would expect out of a paid service. I'm sooooo happy that he has so quickly come to love it so much, he doesn't want to go home with me. And at the same time, I'm sad that he is no longer excited to see me. It's only been 3 days (today is the 4th) and my favorite moment of the day has disappeared. But for a VERY VERY GOOD reason!

As with anything, there are pros and cons. Obviously, the CON to having an excellent day care provider, is that your child is not excited to see you and go home with you. But that is a small price to pay for the overwhelming good things about having a good daycare provider. :)

Guilty Grapefruit fest

I'm not sure exactly what it is that I'm feeling, but maybe someone reading this can help me understand. :)

Once daddy and baby went off to daycare/work, and I was left to do my one day a week remote work and had put in a few hours... all alone in an empty house, I decided it was time for breakfast. The first thought that came to me, was, "GRAPEFRUIT!" And the reasoning behind that thought, is that we have had to hide the scrumptious bag of super tasty grapefruit in the coat closet, and cannot let Kaleb see them. Otherwise, that's all he wants, and won't give up until he gets some. It wouldn't be so bad, except that his poor little chin breaks into a rash/hive thing, and the more he eats, the more his little butt looks like his chin too from all the acidity.

Moderation, you might suggest, right? Doesn't work with a little one who ONLY eats fruit, and LOVES his grapefruit. When the bag sat on the floor in the kitchen, all he would do is drag me into the kitchen and pick up a grapefruit, excitedly babbling and saying "mmmmmmmmmm" which he does even when he just hears the word grapefruit. So we had to start spelling the word when we were thinking about it, otherwise, little Kaleb would start his excited "mmmmmmm" for yummy sounds. :) It is sooooo adorable and cute, and I would LOVE to give it to him, but the damage it does to his little chin and butt make me sadly protect him from eating too much. So, I figured 1x a week, I'll let him have one for breakfast.

But me, on the other hand, I would LOVE to eat it more frequently, but as I cannot do it in his sight, I have to either not do it at all, or wait for a moment like this morning, when he isn't around.

So, I was excited, grabbed the grapefruit out of the coat closet, and started cutting. And then guilt started settling in. Why? I don't know!?! I started thinking about how much Kaleb would LOVE to eat this, it would make him SOOOO happy, and here I am denying him his absolute pleasure in life... And selfishly taking pleasure in it all by myself. By the time I had the thing cut, I was tempted to throw it away, not wanting to be so selfish with something so yummy... And then, I took a bite. MAN was that thing GOOD! There are good grapefruit, bad grapefruit, and then there are top of the line absolutely scrumptious delicious grapefruit. This was one of the latter. Ohhhh... man, talk about more guilt! And funny thing is, I'm not even catholic, so why the guilt trip?